Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
