are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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