I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize