Can i not drive my cunt home
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
