I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Randomize
