I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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