yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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