new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
