haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
