by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
My vagina is officially offended.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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