butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
