Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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