I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
