that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Randomize
