so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
