This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
