Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
