We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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