he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I want a musical about memes.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
