No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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