one might say we're banned from that church
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
