Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
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