super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
