id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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