god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
