I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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