pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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