Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
