3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize