How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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