go do what you do best...puke behind churches
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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