New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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