Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize