I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
