We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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