There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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