maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize