I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Randomize
