This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
