It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize