Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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