Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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