To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I want a musical about memes.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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