The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Maybe he injected his testicle?
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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