Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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