You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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