Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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