They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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