Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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