neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
