I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I need to calm my uterus...
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
