OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize